My how things have changed

Last week the kids and I met GG down in LA while she was there for a sewing conference.  She was staying at a hotel that my co-workers and I used to go to for happy hour.  And this time as I waited in that bar chasing one kid going to the left and the other going to the righ I thought... my how things have changed. 

When we finally met up we went across the street to eat.  When I worked I didn't like to take a lunch because my commute was so long, I didn't want to waste time taking a 30 minute lunch break because I couldn't wait to get home to Kayla.  Now, sitting in Quiznos while the kids ran around, not eating, making it so that I couldn't eat I thought... my how things have changed.

There's a little area outside right by the hotel that I thought we could go hang out in for an hour or so letting the kids run around and spend some free time with GG.  While we were over there Kayla of course had to go to the bathroom.  So, we ran down to a row of restaurants, one of which I had visited with coworkers for a nice  lunch once or twice.  This time as I walked through it quickly carrying 2 bags overflowing with diapers, left over chips, and a nursing cover and dragging Kayla behind me I thought... my how things have changed.

The next day we left for a weekend trip to Ventura for Eric to ride a 100 mile ride.  Both Friday night and Saturday night we were all asleep by 9pm tired from a long week with little sleep (mom) and a long ride (dad).  We ate in the hotel which provided free breakfast and both days after spending about 10-15 minutes trying to convince the kids to eat we ended up back in the room to hang out on the bed and hand feed both of them.  And on Sunday as I slowly packed up the room so we could leave for the day by 9:30am (when we used to have to rush to be out by the noon check out!) I thought... my how things have changed.

It's no secret that kids change your life and it's really pretty obvious most of the time, so obvious you don't really even pay attention to it.  But when it's staring you in the face it's really pretty funny.  Just thought I'd share.

Less WordsThursday: Sibling Love

(Maybe I should rename this, again, to Picture Post since I can never do it on the right day!)

The kids are really starting to enjoy spending time together and this picture captures that.  We were waiting for Eric to check into the cabin at the lake this past weekend and I put Tyler in Kayla's lap in the truck.  This encapsulates what happened for the next 5 minutes!

LOVE IT!

They grow up so fast

Whether they want to or not.  :-) 

And they do.

But do we???

You betcha!

We're having loads of fun over here though "fun" should be loosely interpreted.  Our 10 month old Tyler is finally growing out of his 6 month old clothes and now wears 6-9 month and 9 month clothes.  The pants are still a little big but he'll get there.  He's given up his pacifier - unceremoniously in fact.  He kept spitting it out one night and so there it went.  So, even though I thought he'd have it forever... he won't.  We, he and I, have also agreed that he'd go to sleep in his crib instead of my arms.  Around the same time as the pacifier he was pushing away from me when I was trying to rock him to sleep so down he went.  I still pat him or rock him in the bed but he's one step closer to going to sleep on his own.  Another step is the crying it out at night.  When he wakes up in the middle of the night (which he was doing multiple times a night and wouldn't go back to sleep for an hour or more in the last couple weeks) he cries for a few minutes and then goes back to sleep.  The first night I did this he cried for an hour!  The second night - 10 minutes!  It really does work - if the kid is ready.  This is the 4th or 5th time I tried "cry it out" and the other times he cried for hours without going to bed and it was horrible screaming.  This is much less crying and for a much shorter time.  I guess that means he was ready!  I still feed him at least once during the night ... not sure why...I just do.  So, yea, he's getting to be a big boy.  Big isn't the right word - older.  Ha ha.

(No pics of the above events because they were all about taking something away, so I posted this one instead because I love it!  Such a great picture of my little man!)

And, the big news for Kayla - potty training!  Yep - today we went and bought her some new undies - 34 pairs!  I'm pretty sure she's going to wear all of them tomorrow seeing as she's peed on herself every day for the last week every time I take off her diaper for extended periods of time.  And we bought a 2nd potty - well this is just a seat that sits on top of our regular toilet seat.  And it's Sesame Street! 

She was so excited when we got home.  Wanted the seat open immediately.  Put that seat on top of her baby potty. 

Wore it on her head.... 

Once we got it on the right toilet she was up and down the steps, on and off the potty, on and off, on and off...

She and Tyler were playing with the toilet paper roll - seeing it pile up on the floor.  It was slightly crowded and loud in that bathroom.  Then after 10 or so minutes she sat down on the little pink potty we've had in there for a month and peed.  Success!  For a little while.  She had milk with dinner and I set the timer for 25 minutes after she was drinking and asked if she had to pee.  She said no.  Five minutes later she peed on herself - while wearing her new undies.  Oh well.  She'll get it.  Tomorrow morning we'll be throwing away her "daytime" diapers and only wear undies.  At night I'm keeping her in the diapers until she's dry at night for multiple nights.  So, we'll see how this goes, especially with Tyler in the mix.  And Stroller Strides/Luna Club because we can't stay home for more than Sunday.  We've got plans for Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday of this week so - we'll be carrying around lots of extra clothes and towels. 

We're also talking pre-school/playschool for Kayla for a couple hours a week.  We haven't decided yet but I keep bringing it up.  She was in daycare for a day last week and seemed to enjoy it.  I think it'd be good for her learn from someone else and be around kids other than Stroller Strides kids who we see every day!  Also thinking of gymnastics but gotta figure out what to do with Tyler while I do that with Kayla since it's during the week. 

It's all a little stressful and this whole having 2 so close together is really showing but we'll make it through.  We just gotta take it one day at a time. 

Less Words Wednesday

As you know, we spend a lot of time at the park.  This week we went to a new park and the kids had fun playing with the "new" stuff.  I say "new" becuase it's still slides and tunnels and stairs but it's new to them. 

And, since we are usually with a bunch of other kids, Kayla's usually running around playing with them.  But this time it was just us and she and Tyler had some fun of their own!  I love seeing them play and I hope they always continue to have fun together!

Our Texas Trip Part 1: Getting There

On our first trip to Texas with a kid, when Kayla was 5 months old, the only way I could organize my thoughts on everything that happened there was to make several blog posts listing out various aspects.  And, again, since this was another 2 week trip with all kinds of craziness, including Christmas, I thought I'd do the lists again.  But as I got started I realized that was never gonna work.  So, there's going to be separate posts and separate Picasa Web Albums for each activity - there are 12!  So it will probably take me 12 days to write them all... at least.

First up - getting to Texas.  Our tickets may have said it was only a 2.5 hour flight but it was an almost 14 hour trip for us.  We left our house around 9:30am and we got to Rita's house around 11pm.  That is one full day of traveling!  Sheesh.

We decided on the way to the airport that Eric would drop me off at "curbside" with

1. the kids
2. the kids diaper bag
3. the kids food bag... well, Kayla's food bag
4. the kids toy bag
5. the stroller
6. the kids suitcase

Then, I would:

1. check that bag
2. go through security by myself with the kids
3. feed Tyler and
4. wait at the gate for Eric

While Eric

1. parked the car
2. uninstalled the car seat base
3. rode the bus with the car seat, base, and our suitcase

So he could:

1. Check our bag
2. go through security by himself 
3. meet us at the gate with the car seat

Doesn't sound very fair does it?  But, it actually worked pretty well.  Kayla sat patiently in her stroller, I wore Tyler in my carrier, and all the bags fit on the stroller with Kayla.  Security made me take everything out and put it on the conveyor belt, including mine and Kayla's shoes, the carrier, and the stroller, which means I had to walk with Kayla and carry Tyler through the x-ray machine.  Thank goodness they hadn't yet installed the super crazy x-ray machines they've been talking about in the news.  Because of all this I made some poor TSA schmuck open up the stroller and another one hold Tyler while I put the carrier back on.  The rest was a breeze... Kayla sat in the stroller and looked around the airport while Tyler ate and had a diaper change.  And, conveniently enough, dad met us at the gate about 5 minutes before we boarded.  We boarded first, gate checked the car seat, base, and stroller, and were able to get situated in our full row of seats since we bought Kayla's ticket without any trouble.

Kayla really enjoyed looking at the other plane next to us and reading the Airplane book I borrowed from the library.  I think I read it 10 times while we waited, taxied, and took off... then she was over it an onto a Dora book. 

Everyone's always worried about the kids ears during take off and landing so every few minutes I asked Kayla to take a sip of her water... or was it juice... I have no idea.  And guess what.  She complied!  Surprise!  And no complaints about the ears.  Tyler took his pacifier and slept so he was good.  Stupid pilot woke him up talking about some dumb mountain range or desert or something but at least he wasn't cranky.  Both kids did so well on the plane.  Luckily we had a portable DVD player and some Dora dvds that kept Kayla entertained... and Tyler's still easy to fly with without any fanfare and even took a couple naps, though none of them very long.  Notice there's no mention of a nap for Kayla.  Nope - she was too excited to nap.

Once we landed we met up with Nana and waited a thousand years for our luggage.  Good thing Nana likes to walk because Kayla walked her around that conveyor belt many times! 

When we finally got to Nana's house we had some pizza, watched some TV, and played with some Dora dominoes and puzzles for a couple hours to give Kayla some non travel time for the day.  We then got them in their pjs and loaded them in the car around 9pm for the trip to Rita's.  9pm?  Yep, because that was really 7pm CA time - about the time Kayla goes down if she doesn't nap and about the time Tyler goes down every night.  They both slept the whole way, though Kayla did wake up a couple times but I crawled into the backseat and all was well.

When we got to Rita's we put Kayla in Rita's bed and Tyler in a borrowed pack n play.  All was good until 3am when Kayla woke up with Rita in bed with her and flipped out.  Apparently you should tell a kid when someone will be in the bed with them.  :-)  Tyler woke up a lot that night too - it was definitely a restless evening.  But all was good the next morning and we were able to start our fun filled 2 week trip! 

See why I didn't want to do a list of our activities in this first trip.  It would have been a novel!  Up next... hanging out at Rita's house and Jack's graduation.  Probably more pictures and less text.  I needed to fully document this momentous occasion of our first (and last for a while) flight to Texas as a family of 4 with 2 kids under the age of 2!  What do you think - too much detail?  :-)

Brother and Sister Bear

I am totally loving how the kids are starting to interact.  Kayla has been playing with Tyler for a while now but now Tyler can sort of respond, or at least be receptive. 

She hands him rings, he can generally take them (and if he doesn't she forces the issue). 

She loves to give him hugs (I hold him up, she stands up and hugs him, or gives him a bear hug if I lay him down on top of her)

At night she gives him a hug and says "nite nite.  I love you."  Which I totally love and eat up every night!

They sit in the chair together and I'll read to them, sometimes.  If we're downstairs they stare at me or the tv.

This morning when I walked into the living room, after I had set him down beside her, I saw this...



They don't look happy but they were - they were watching Dora!

She doesn't really like him playing with her toys but we're working on her sharing.  It's a long time coming, but we try. 
She tries to take care of him when he cries by giving him his pacifier or patting him on the head and saying "Okay.  Tyler.  Okay". 

If he's laying down or sitting and she comes over by him his little face lights up and he gets a big ole smile.  Such a change from the days when he would cry when she came around.  :-) 

I can tell they are going to love playing with each other.  It might take some time to get there since kids do not like to share but it'll happen.  She generally likes to have him around, understands (to the extent that a not yet 2 year old can understand) that sometimes he needs me.  Right now the names she calls him are the right ones - brother, baby, and Tyler - though I know it won't be that way forever. I know I've written about some of this before but they are getting better together and it's very cool to watch her become such a cute big sister.  I hope they become (and stay) close, protect one another, laugh with one another, share with one another.  We debated after she was born whether or not to have a second kid and I'm so glad we did.  They (I hope) are going to have so much fun!  I'm just glad I'm here to see it (instead of at work!)

I quit!

***I wrote this a few weeks back but didn't post it because I was waiting to put it on a blog I'm going to be writing for a local website, but that is slow in starting up so I'm not waiting any longer.***

That's right, I did it!  I quit my job!  Some would say that's not a smart move in this economy, especially with two kids.  Others would say that it was an excellent choice to stay home with my two young children.  Well, everyone is right.  :-) 

It is a rough time right now, but since my job was questionable anyway (because of the horrible budgetary problems at LAUSD right now) as were my benefits, it's not a horrible time.  And it is great to stay home with my children - anyone who is willing to and can afford it should.  But those two things don't always happen.  Some people, possibly myself included, are meant to work.  They need to interact with adults, they need to be productive in the workforce, they feel a sense of accomplishment from earning a paycheck and contributing to the family financially not to mention contributing to the working world.  Some people are meant to be moms or dads at home, teaching their young children, watching them grow up, shaping their every day lives on a very real and personal level. 

Which am I?  I don't know.  I know I'm enjoying being at home with them, but that it's incredibly difficult.  It's hard to be around kids all day, I have no idea how teachers do it.  It's hard if you're put on an "allowance" because you don't bring in income (this is not the case with me, but it's certainly not unheard of).  It's hard to figure out how to entertain and teach the children all day.  But, to see them learn new things on a daily basis, see them concentrating so hard on new tasks, hear their laughter and know that they are laughing because of something you did - that makes it all worth while.  This is not to say that working parents don't enjoy these same things, but just on a smaller time frame. 

As someone who worked for the first year of her first child's life, I'm here to say, I much prefer not working.  (Not that it isn't work, but you know what I mean.)  I don't have our lives figured out yet, and there are a million piles around our house, the dishes aren't done and the laundry needs to be put away but today I watched Kayla make a friend (social skills), I watched her climb up a rocky surface to get to a slide (determination and balance), I nursed my baby boy all day long (instead of pumping at work all day just to get 1 feeding!), I watched Kayla have the time of her life sliding down a bumpy slide (fun!), I showed her sticks and leaves and grass (curiosity), I rocked my baby to sleep, I carried Kayla around and slid down slides with her (bonding), I watched as Kayla tried to hug Tyler and instead ended up laying on him - and he laughed, I comforted her when she woke up not feeling well from her nap (comfort), I helped my baby sit up, roll over, stand up, and sit down, I read my little girl bedtime books and sang her lullabies before going to bed (literacy), and made Tyler laugh by eating his belly.  Yea, it was all play for them, but what else are they supposed to do this young?  I am just so glad I was able to be a part of it, to watch them grow right before my eyes. 

If we can manage it, I would love to stay home.  If we can't and I go back to work, I'll remember these months we've had together with love and cherish our time together even more!  Until then, I'm going to try to figure this all out.

Ch Ch Ch Changes

Our kids are growing up!  Did you know that?  I might be forcing it a little though.  In preparation for our trip to TX, where Kayla will need  to sleep in her own bed, not a crib or a pack and play, I thought we'd start getting her used to a bed now.  Yes, I could rent a crib in TX but we're not staying in one place the whole time so that wouldn't really work.  And, we have to move her out of it so we can move Tyler into it in a couple months anyway.  So, now's the time.  Maybe the day Daylight Savings Time ends wasn't the best night but there's never a good time so whatever.  Unfortunately, I made this decision at around 6:45pm that night when bedtime's at 8 so it was kind of a crazy night.  I entertained the kids while Eric took the front railing off Kayla's crib... but I didn't entertain for long enough because we were in her room playing while dad was still trying to get the guard rail put up.  There are no "during" pictures - too much craziness!

So, the finished product...

And the happy child...

It turns out we put that guardrail up on the wrong kind of bed, it's supposed to be put on a regular adult bed, but we're going to try it anyway.  I'm a little worried that Kayla will lean on it too hard and meet the floor rather quickly but we'll see.  We both told her multiple times not to lean on the guard rail, no pushing on it, no kicking it, don't even touch it.  Of course she can't not do any of those things it but hopefully she won't break it.  I'm going to try this for a few weeks then we'll see about taking it off.  It's on there so that she doesn't fall out right?  But it's so big that it's almost like her actual crib.  So, I want to try it without it for a couple weeks before Christmas so that when we are there and she's sleeping on a blow up mattress by herself, she's used to it and we aren't dealing with repeatedly putting her back in bed every night we're there.  I'm sure it will still happen but to a lesser degree.  And, so far so good because even though there is a little opening on the side so she can get in and out by herself, she hasn't yet.  In the morning and after naps I go in there to find her quietly "reading" on the right side of the bed - that's always been her little spot (to sit and "read" not to sleep - she sleeps all over the bed, in all kinds of directions). 
In related news... we moved to Tyler to the pack and play about two weeks ago.  He was hitting his head a lot in his sleep and waking himself up.  We were using the padding that Christine made for it on 3 sides but if we used it on all 4 there wouldn't be much more room left for Tyler.  So, at 11pm one night after he had woken himself up 3 times since 8pm we made the switch.  And you know what, he generally only wakes up once a night now.  Well, 2 but I give him his pacifier the first time and then feed him the 2nd time.  But it's better than every couple of hours.  I don't love the pack and play - it's slanted so he only sleeps on one side of it - but it's temporary.  It depends on how this bedding situation goes with Kayla, and how long Tyler continues to need to eat in the middle of the night.  As soon as he's sleeping better (through the night), and we're comfortable with Kayla in her own bed, we'll move him to the crib and they'll be sharing a room.  And that, my friends, is a whole other blog post. 

GOODNIGHT!

I'm the Big Sister

It's been a few months now since Tylo came to live with us and I thought I would tell you just what I think about that. 

 Mostly I'm interested in him, in this weird little thing that suddenly appeared one day.  I mean, I haven't always liked him because he certainly does take attention away from me sometimes but I'm getting used to it him.

Mostly I just like to help him and mommy.  I like to push him in the swing, even when it swings back and knocks me down. 

I like to get his diapers for mommy... but just to show I'm not 100% on board with this little one, I put it on his face. 

I also like to hand him toys... or ya know... play with him like he's my toy.

Sometimes I like to try to pick Tylo up - Mommy does it so why can't I?  The other day when he was getting read to drink some milk I thought I'd be helpful and hand him to Mommy.  Mommy didn't think that was a good idea yet - said he's too big for me but he seems pretty small.  Whatev.

Sometimes I like to have mommy sit him down next to me.

I even insist that he sits in my lap sometimes!

When mommy or daddy reads me a book, I sometimes like to make sure he sees the pictures in the books.  Wouldn't want him to feel left out.

 You've all seen how good I am about giving him kisses but sometimes I like to give him a good squeeze hug.  I secretly just like to slobber on him or see just how hard I can squeeze!

When Tylo started to smile I tried to make him laugh - he's not there yet.  But it was fun to tickle him to make him try.

 Recently mommy and daddy brought down a piece of paper with a bunch of black things on it and said that Tylo likes to look at it.  I don't know why.  I  mean, it's pretty, but it's certainly not as colorful as my pictures!  I should show him my pictures!

But if he likes it, I'll show it to him.

I'm very aware of when he wakes up and cries while I'm trying not to take my afternoon nap - I tell mommy, from my crib, that he's awake.  And if he's just fallen asleep I tell mommy "shhhh, the baby."  I'm not always quiet myself when he's sleeping because that's hard to do, but I try.

Mom thought it'd be a good idea for me to show him how to lay down on the blankets one day but to me that translates to - I must always lay down on the blanket first and if mom tries to lay him down first, or by himself, I make sure she knows that I don't appreciate that!

I've tried to help her put him to sleep by rocking his cradle.  I don't think mommy thought that was very helpful since I'm such a good rocker.  I was doing it just like mommy and rocking with all my might.  What's wrong with that?

Whenever I wake up, or we go somewhere without him, I ask where he's at.  I must know - I'm his keeper - I need to know where he is at all times. 

I guess he's okay to have around.  At first I was a little jealous of him, but when I saw that he doesn't do much I realized that mommy, daddy, and I can still have fun.  But I like to help him try to play with us sometimes.  I give him rattles since he seems to like them, but I know he can't grab them yet so I try really hard to get them in his hand... not always possible. 

I wonder if he'll ever be able to play with me.  I hope so!  I do like being his big sister... for now.

Three out of four ain't bad...

Unless you're talking about the number of people in your house sick! 

Last week was no fun.  On Tuesday I went to bed with an upset stomach.  By Wednesday morning it was so bad, and I was SOOOO hot, Eric had to stay home to help with the kids (at least someone still gets sick days!) because there was no way I was going to be able to run after Kayla all day with an upset stomach and various other aches and pains.  Luckily after a few naps during the day I was feeling better.  Thursday was low key because I was still out of it but I did go out dancing with my friends (a Mom's Night Out that had been month's in the making - I was not going to miss it!)  But I came home feeling bad again (and not because of too much to drink!) with the addition of 4 blisters on my feet!  Friday morning Kayla had a runny nose but we went to the park anyway.  She was a trooper but wore out quickly and on the way home I could feel a sore throat coming on.  Really?  The last few days of ickiness wasn't enough?  No, I needed myself and my daughter to catch colds. 

Nope, not gonna happen.  One of the blogs I follow posted, that day, a Sick Busting Soup recipe made purely of broth, garlic, and onions.  I made Eric stop and get 5 cans of broth, 6 onions, and a blub of garlic and then spent half an hour cutting up onions!  Do you know how many tears I cried.  Eric wasn't a big fan and didn't finish his soup, but even if there wasn't much to it I was going to gobble it all up. And you know what, it worked.  No sore throat the next day.  Too bad Tyler couldn't eat it because that night he couldn't stay asleep because he kept choking on his own crap in his throat!  He kept waking up every 10 -15 minutes screaming and was sometimes inconsolable (which, if you know Tyler, you know that doesn't happen often).  We tried the aspirator (even a battery operated one), saline drops, burping, rocking, walking, holding... nothing was working.  Made me nervous enough to spend almost 2 hours at Urgent Care even though I knew it was just a cold. 

(This picture makes me want to cry.  He looked so worried.  I sat there and held his hands and told him it was fine.  I'm sure he was just wondering what was going on and why I wouldn't just let him sleep but this expression says otherwise. Though I'm sure the placement of the mask, and the lack of comfort there had something to do with the expression.)

(this makes me feel a little better, it doesn't look quite so bad...)

Just wanted to be sure it wasn't in his lungs. So, that was Saturday evening (not quite the same as it used to be) and he's been sleeping in his car seat ever since - going on 3 days now for all at-home naps and bedtime. But he sleeps soundly in there.

Poor guy, he only wanted to sleep and kept falling asleep between weighings and breathing treatments and doctors (that makes it sound like he had a lot done to him - he didn't). Which was good news for me - I always knew he slept well at night, but this was amazingly well.



Anyway, so Kayla's been sick since Friday with a horrible runny nose and itchy eyes so she rubs snot all over her face and in her eyes.  She now has a nice little rash going, even down on her neck.  And I think she's teething too because she always wants a teether.  And Tyler is fine when he's awake but he's not draining his crap so Lord knows what's going on there....I just know he's sleeping more than usual (today he took 3 naps that were 30-50 minutes  plus two 2+ hour naps).  Fine with me though - as long as he feels okay.  And now I have a fever blister!  Good Lord!  When does it end???

It's not really that bad, it was just one thing after another.  And now that it's Monday, the sick weekend is over, I feel so much better.  Physically and mentally - today was just a new start. 

(Un)fortunatly, Kayla becomes a little more hyper when she's sick - I guess she's trying to not be sick.  So, while she was running crazy this weekend she ended up looking like this:

Wish us well!

Juggling Two Under Two

Until a year ago I never thought about having 2 kids under the age of 2... well... maybe I did since we planned to get pregnant when Kayla turned 1 but she would have been closer to 2 than she is now.  Whatever - point being - didn't really think about it.  Even when I was pregnant.  People would ask me how I was going to do it and I answered honestly - I had no idea.  I figured we'd just go on about our business and things would work themselves out.  And, generally, they are.  But, hello!  I have 2 under 2!  It's not all wine and roses - nope it's milk and burp cloths. 

I'm gonna be honest here - this isn't a happy post.  It's not sad or anything but it's honest.  And I'll try to keep the complaining to a minimum because there are certainly worse things in life (Alyssa, if you're reading this you know what I'm talking about.)  But, like I said, honest.  It's hard.  I remember when Kayla was little (b/c she's oh so big now, right?) and Eric would come home from work and ask what we did all day and I had no answer for him because what in the world was I supposed to get accomplished with a newborn at home?  They take up all your time.  Really?  Do they?  Really?  Well, now that I've got a newborn and a toddler I'm hear to say - however old your kid is, if they aren't in school they take up a lot of your time, if not all of it.  I spend at least half, if not more, of my day getting one or the other one fed or to sleep or changed. 

So, that leaves half my day for entertaining them, teaching them, being productive, and having some adult time either by myself or with Eric (or both).  When they are older it'll be great to have them so close in age because they'll be into the same things and learning sorta the same things.  Right now they are worlds apart. 

I'm trying to prevent watch Kayla run all over the library while wearing Tyler so I can't really run after her, and it's a library so I can't yell at her to get back over here. 

I'm trying to get him some much needed tummy time because I didn't do it the first few weeks of life because he slept so dang much and here she comes trying to lay down on with him. 

If I try to put him in the swing or on his back on the mat she's trying to jump on him, pick him up, or hug him... all of which are dangerous at this age. 

We can eat meals together, provided he's eating on the left side (so my right hand is free) and her meal is completely toddler ready (meaning all cut up and easy to eat). 

We can go on walks together.  I can't put them both in the wagon yet, but that time will come.  I have 2 double strollers so we can and do go for walks in those. 

I do try to read to both of them at the same time, at least showing him the pictures. 

Can't really let her go in the toddler pool since I'd have to hold him and if she fell down in there she'd still be under water (it's only a foot but a foot of water is a foot of water!).  I can't play with her on her water mat, but she can entertain herself in there. 

If I try to get him down for a nap, what do I do with her so she doesn't yell or talk loudly, as she's prone to do, and wake him up?  He sleeps upstairs so I gotta leave her downstairs to put him down - what can she get into? 

She needs to be changed so he's stuck in the chair or in the crib while she attempts to help me change her (potty training time anyone?)  If he's on the chair within a few minutes he's worked himself down so he's all slouchy or he's fallen over and bent in half.

He's pretty easy to handle right now - you can put him down and walk away and not worry that he's going to go running off in the opposite direction.  Those times will come. 

At the park, he needs to eat or be changed, and she's off running around the playground (which is generally fine, but there are still stairs and ledges she can fall off.  Thank GOD for other moms!)

I need to change his diaper but she lays down on any blanket or pillow we put on the ground.  She actually will fling herself down, get up when I ask her too, hover over it until I'm about to put him down and then fling herself down on it again.  This becomes a little game - to her.  Not to me. 

It's just every day stuff.  The early weeks/months of having a baby is hard no matter what.  I mean, it's not rocket science hard, but the adjustment to your life is hard.  Figuring things out.  Making a routine.  Throw a toddler into that mix and you've got a recipe for craziness that includes a lot of liquor and tears.  It's fun.  They make me laugh.  A lot.  They makes me want to pull out my hair... and theirs.  She makes me want to squeeze her tight (sometimes maybe a little too tight) and tell them I love them a million times a day (I don't want to squeeze him yet, he's not sturdy enough yet at only about 11 lbs.  But it's just crazy here.  Just enough crazy to have a messy house and hurried lives... and we aren't even involved in school projects, committee meetings, parent/teacher nights, sports games, practices, rehearsals, etc. 

Life...ready or not...here we come!

P.S. I don't even want to know what twins would be like!  Mom's of twins are SUPER moms!

Who needs sleep???

Apparently not our kids!  Must be genetic, only it didn't come from us. 

Kayla has ALWAYS had a nap time problem.  We finally got bed times situated but never quite figured out nap times.  I thought in the last month or so, maybe, but then this weekend comes along and bam!  No sleep!  Yesterday she was DEAD tired when we got home and I put her right in her crib at 1pm.  She cried/talked/laughed/yelled for almost 2 hours before finally giving up the fight.  And she slept until 5 pm!Today, she wasn't nearly as tired when I put her in there and she cried/talked/laughed/yelled for just over 2 hours before I finally went in and got her.  She actually behaved well but didn't eat dinner - so no nap and no dinner... what's up with that?? I really think her teeth are bothering her b/c she's constantly chewing on something. 

But still, that doesn't explain Tyler. 

Our sweet baby boy who used to sleep ALL the time, so much so that I was worried he was sleeping too much decided he'd only sleep for a total of 4 hours today, instead of the usual 6 or 7 - and for a 2 month old those few extra hours mean a lot.  I kept trying... I think I spent most of the day trying to get him to sleep and just as he'd drift off he'd wake up or be woken up.  Or he'd wake up 5 minutes after I put him in the cradle.  He didn't cry a lot, which is good, he just wasn't very awake at all today.  Then, just when I was getting excited that we'd have an evening that started at 7:30 b/c both kids would be asleep from their lack of naps during the day - Tyler took 25 minutes to get to sleep, falling asleep just before 8pm and woke up 20 minutes later - bright eyed and bushy tailed and didn't go back to sleep until 9:30! 

Seriously people!  What's up with our kids???

And as I finish writing this post, 10 minutes after I put Tyler down - he's up again.  Ughhh... I don't know if I can handle any more tonight!  I just want to go to bed - now at 9:45 having done nothing this evening, or today, except try to get other people to sleep.  My luck - I won't be able to sleep myself!  Wish me luck!!!

Home alone... (It's a long one!)

For a good part of the day I'm home alone with the two kids now.  Eric has a little bit of time in the mornings, and sometimes comes home for lunch, but just like he has a full day of work I do too.  And boy can it be stressful.

Being a  stay at home mom is a tough adjustment.  It's even harder, I assume, when you're also adjusting to life with a newborn and a toddler.  I never know what I should be doing during the day, besides feeding and changing them.  I try to keep us moving, but since I'm not used to being a full time mom, progress is slow.    What kind of play time do they need?  I have no idea.  How do I react to her outburst?  Oops, I yelled ... again... now what?  How do I teach her not to hit when I so badly want to spank her?  How do I tell her "don't yell" when I want to yell?  What's causing the meltdowns and how can I prevent them?  Parenting is hard... it was hard at nights and on the weekends but it's even harder as a full time job.  You have a lot of work to do, and a lot of pressure (mostly self inflicted) to instill good manners, traits, and skills in these youngsters.  And I've only been at this for a couple weeks. 

On top of that, mommy guilt has set in. Do I really give her the attention she needs? Do I stimulate her enough? Is he held enough? What is he supposed to be able to do right now? Is he stimulated enough? Do they know I love them? How do I teach her? What do I teach her? How do I get her to not scream as much? What's with the tantrums? What am I doing wrong? I really feel bad that I have to spend so much time nursing him (even though he's a world class champ when it comes to speed eating - only eating about10 minutes) and getting him to sleep (that takes much longer - about 20 minutes) only for him to sleep for anywhere from 30 minutes to an hour and a half before wanting to eat again. For a toddler who wants you to sit down and play with her, that can be frustrating. And for the mom who hears "sit?" 10 times in a row it's frustrating.  I'm sure she gets plenty of my time... more than she used to get... but you still wonder if it's enough.  Then there's his attention - when she demands so much more (assuming he's calm) it's hard to make sure he's getting his fair share.  Oh the guilt!

I am, however, getting the hang of going out with the two of them by myself (we've been a variety of stores, the grocery, the post office, the mall - all on our own!).  Kayla's been very good about riding in the carts or walking with me while I wear him.  I do need some help with patience, because when we go to one too many places or we go too close to lunch time she starts acting out.  It's my own fault, I should know better, but when she's doing so good you forget that in 2 minutes she can turn on you!  :-)  But, really, she's been very good out in public. 

At home, we're working on things.  We're working on the discipline and how to handle the outbursts.  We're working on getting Tyler to fall asleep even though she's talking and laughing and yelling.  We're working on what in the world to eat during the day.  I'm sure she'd gladly eat waffles every day but I'm pretty sure that even though I bought the "lite" syrup there's still more sugar in there than she really needs.  We're working on how to handle it when both of them are crying... or, ya know, when just one of them is crying.  We're working on finding balance.... there has to be some... somewhere. 

So, do I like it?  I do.  As long as I can keep us busy.  There are stressful times every day, but I'm trying to laugh at more things, to take things slower, to be patient.  But, I'm so not patient.  I try, but there are times when my timeline and either of their timelines do not match up and that is when we break down.  Do I think I could do this long term, I have no idea.  Right now we're learning, figuring things out.  There are good days and bad days.  I'm looking forward to Tyler getting into a routine, so we can all get into a routine... that would go a long way in making the adjustment.  Then I just have to figure out how to teach and entertain them.  Right now it's just about keeping us alive.  :-)

And, for those who want to know, this is what our days usually look like right now. 

6:30am
wake up 
get everyone dressed
feed the kiddos a morning snack
say bye to dad
play with toys
make breakfast
feed Tyler
go to park, run errands, and/or take a walk (1 or 2 of those)
feed Tyler
make and eat lunch
play/read
feed Tyler(hopefully he falls asleep)

1:00pm
put Kayla down for a nap and listen to her talk/cry for 20 minutes
mom's nap time
feed Tyler
mom's productive time - clean up from lunch and pick up toys.  check email.  make phone calls, write blog, upload pics, etc.
get Kayla up from nap and provide snack
feed Tyler
play/watch sesame street/do a craft
feed Tyler
dad comes home and play with kids
mom cooks dinner
more play time or a walk

8:00pm
Bath time and bed time for kiddos

2 weeks in

So far, so good, but things are changing.  Kayla is getting a little more jealous, wants to be in my lap more when Tyler's in my lap, is acting out more, is getting into more trouble.  But, we're trying to spend more alone time with her, which isn't hard right now since I delivered Mr. Sleepypants, but it's still different for her right now. 

As parents of 2, with 1 parent not operating at 100% yet, we still getting our bearings.  My incision is generally pain free now, but I have sciatica so that's what's causing the most amount of pain and the inability to move very quickly or in certain ways.  So, while I'm doing more, I'm not doing everything.  I'm trying though.  Eric's been more productive - taking care of mail, bills, cleaning, and most errands.  My focus is on the kids.  Eric's been good about playing with Kayla though - she sure does love playing with him, wrestling, playing peek a boo, doing the hokey pokey.  :-)  I imagine things will get harder before they get easier but we'll see. 

I finally got out of the house with the both of them yesterday and today, and have plans for the rest of the week as well.  Kayla needed out.  So far it's just been trips to the park to see my Stroller Strides friends, tomorrow it's a free trial gymnastics class and Thursday is a story time for toddlers.  Friday we'll be back at the park.  I just have to get Kayla out with other kids - even though right now she tends to play by herself.  She's gotten into a shy stage in the last month or so - takes her a while to warm up to folks - but I think getting out of the house is helpful for her. 

Anyway, so new things we found out about Tyler this week....

... he just randomly screams, and sounds absolutely PISSED OFF!  Usually he's just hungry, or uncomfortable, or tired, but sometimes he screams just to scream, just once, and then he's done, for a little while.

... is still sleeping most of the day

... he has a serious oral fixation but i haven't been able to get him to take a pacifier yet.

... he grunts a lot, I mean a lot.  When he's awake, asleep, eating, it doesn't matter - he just grunts.

... always looks worried

... has a reeeeally flexible big toe- it flexes almost completely back

... tends to need to relax in the middle of his meal - loosening his belt as it were.  :-)

... likes to go to sleep either eating (which I don't prefer) or sitting up against me (so I'm getting a lot of use out of the mei tai wrap that Grandma made me last year for Kayla).

... lost his umbilical cord and his plastibell from his circumcision this week (well, the plastibell came off on Wednesday, so 2 weeks and a day technically, but who's counting?)

Wonder what's in store for us in the coming weeks.  :-)

The 2nd time around

I forgot...

...that newborns sleep SO much

... that I wouldn't be functional for a while (well, i knew i wouldn't be but i thought it'd be a little easier this time and, honestly, it is but not as good as I would like)

... that a baby's cry isn't as loud as a toddlers

... that babies take forever to eat

... how much nursing hurt!  Ouchie wa wa!

... that babies peel, especially around their fingernails...I'm always afraid they are hangnails and I'm gonna hurt him. 

What I know now...

... that babies aren't nearly as fragile as I once thought they were.  He's gonna be okay if Kayla pokes him or shakes his crib (though we do try to prevent her from doing both, but it's inevitable).

... that babies cry at diaper changes and there's not a whole lot you can do about that.

... that you don't have to wake babies up to feed them (or for any other reason) ... we should all enjoy their time asleep as much as we do their time awake

... that there's always something to worry about

... that you have got to stay on top of trimming their nails, especially now when they have absolutely no control over where their hands go - poor guy has scratches all over his head and face.

... that the babies cry doesn't have to be answered immediately.  I mean, don't wait half an hour or anything, but a few minutes of crying isn't going to hurt him. 

So far, that's it... I'm sure there will be new revelations every day.  (And this probably isn't it, but it's all I can think of right now.  I've gone from pregnancy brain to mommy brain... things just fall out of it all the time.  :-)

The difference

So today, our first day home, I was relaxing on the couch (and the chair and the patio) while Tyler slept and Kayla ran around (with Rita and Eric chasing after her).  Kayla's not that old but she is, comparatively.  It's so interesting to see the differences between them and within them.  Kayla's been really hyper since Tuesday, constantly running around and yelling and laughing.  She's been pretty well behaved, though she is getting away with more with Gammy than she does with us.  (But that's what grandparents are for right?)  She's very interested in Tyler, wants to put stickers on him, wants to hold him and see him and watch him.  But, watching her play around today, her dexterity, her intentions and desires, is so fascinating.  It's not like she knows THAT much more this week than she knew last week but maybe I just have the opportunity to watch her more now.  Whatever the reason, it's fascinating.  I love watching her, seeing how she interacts with people, see how much she loves her daddy, see how determined she is to do certain things.  She's growing and learning more each day - I'm just glad that (for now) I have the time to sit and watch it happen.  That will soon come to an end I assume but I'm going to enjoy it while it lasts.

I'm a big sister!

Guess what!  I have a baby brother.  He's mine!  I told him so too - the very first time I held him!  I was so excited to meet him finally after hearing about him for months!  When daddy brought him over to me I got a big ole smile on my face - couldn't help myself!

Gammy even let me hold him - I don't think he liked that very much but I sure was happy as a clam.  I didn't want to let him go.

We tried to get some family photos but I was too busy pointing out Tyler's pieces and parts - his toes, his knee, his mouth... he has the same parts that I have. 

Can't wait to play with him at home!